I know I do, on occasion, tend towards exaggeration but yesterday I witnessed what can only be described as the deep chasm of anarchy. "What, in Auckland?" I hear you say. Don't believe me, then read on.....
It is quite easy, in these tumultuous times, to assume that we are all going to hell on a handcart, or some other wooden wheeled contraption. Actually, come to think of it, if I was to go to the warmer of the two afterlifes, you couldn't pick a better mode of transport than a handcart. Yes, if I'm heading somewhere where I don't particularly want to go, then it's a slow and unreliable mode of transport for me.
So I've digressed. Again. Back to the point.
Yes, it's quite easy to come to the conclusion that we are all heading for disaster. Markets flutter seemingly at the sight of a slightest risk. Financial markets mind you, not the retail kind. Which also flutter but it's usually due to a stiff breeze and not some megalomaniacal leader in a big house. Not only markets but we all seem to be eyeing each other with suspicion and wondering who is going to react first. Technically you can't react first, as the definition of a reaction requires something to happen in order for it to be reacted to. I guess that just goes to show how jittery people are when they are even considering a pre-emptive reaction. Hhhmmm. Anyway, let's just agree that the world appears to be on a knife edge and leave it at that.....
What? Oh, yes the chasm of anarchy. That's where I came in but I appear to gone off the point. Sorry.
Right. The chasm of anarchy. You see last night Auckland was fortunate enough to have the rather splendid PJ Harvey within it's city limits and I, being appreciate of her music, decided to go along and see her an her band perform songs from her latest release. All was going swimmingly; I found the venue, parked the car and bought a pie and a packet of crisps from the canteen - we are quite civilised here in New Zealand when it comes to live entertainment.
Being of an age, I had decided to purchase tickets for the seating area and so I obediently went up the stairs and found my allocated seat. It wasn't difficult and just a case of matching the row letter with the seat number. I am regularly surprise to see how often people find this concept of alpha-numerical system of seat assignments so difficult, be it a concert, cinema or aeroplane. In this case, people seemed to take an age debating whether they had the right row, seat or even if this was the place they were supposed to be at in the first place. I did wonder that very thought when I glanced along my row to see an elderly couple sat starting out at the sea of people. Security is quite tight these days so I assume they were at the correct concert and not wondering why so many people were dressed in leather to see Richard Clayderman.
Anyway, after a few wrong turns and heated debate about the seat assignments, people eventually settled down to watch the concert. Or at least I thought they had. Then it all started to kick off'
"Excuse me, I think you have the wrong seat," a bearded man said to the couple in the row in front of me
"Yes we do but you see someone has sat in our seats so we just sat here," came the response.
"I see, but these are our seats," came the reply, quite inevitably
"Well there are still plenty of others so just pick another," the wrongly-seated couple offered.
The advice was taken and so another couple sat in the incorrectly allocated seats. This wasn't going to end well.
Predictably, another few people arrived to find that their seats had also been commandeered by a displaced customer and they, like those before them, sloped off to find an empty set of seats. The ball was really rolling now, as more and more people were unable to take their seats as displaced people had occupied their spot. Tensions were rising as people feared that there would not be enough room for everybody and voices were starting to be raised and fists clenched. The venues security team were called in to try and placate people and resolve the issue.
"Sir, can you please move to your correct seat," one particularly burly guard suggested
"I'd love to but someone is already sat in it and won't move," came the response, "If you can free our seats we'll happily move but otherwise we're not budging!".
A rather brave response I must say given the size of the guard.
The security guard set off to find the offending person and was never seen again. I must say, for the record, that I was sat in the correct seat and was enjoying the spectacle safe in the knowledge that I had followed the rules and done nothing wrong. Not that would have been any comfort to me if it all went biblical, so to speak. I was sat right in the middle of the action and was in no place to feel smug and safe at the same time.
"Those are our seats, please move."
The bearded man was back and having another go at reclaiming his seats.
"Oh you again. Sod off and find another!"
Yikes, it really was going to get rough in here. And the concert had not even started yet. I started to consider my options. Should I stay put and risk getting caught in the cross-fire, despite knowing that I was in the right? Maybe I should make a hasty retreat and go and stand on the ground floor with the rest of the great unwashed. No damn it! I'd chosen a while ago that I wanted to have a seat and have a seat I would, even if it cost me my front teeth. I would take the moral high ground and stay put. Actually I sunk as low as I could into my seat and hoped the whole thing would just blow over....
...and as the house lights went down and PJ came onto the stage people cut their losses and sat down. Phew! Little did PJ know but she had disarmed the situation and peace had returned to the provinces. Or at least the dress circle for which I was mightily relieved.
But what is it that makes someone decide that they can just sit anywhere, despite clearly having been allocated a particular seat? Is it arrogance, ignorance or a mixture of both? Why do they thing that they have more rights than anyone else. Presumably their seat was not to their liking so they took someone else's? Maybe theirs was a bit cramped and they needed more room? Or perhaps they just wanted to cause trouble?
Without sounding all British, seat allocations are there for a reason. To allocate seats to people who have bought tickets and systematically dole out space. It's a fair and simple system - those who get tickets early can choose where they want to sit, safe in the knowledge that the seat will be there waiting for you. Leave it a bit too late and you get whatever is left, thankful in the knowledge that you were lucky to get a ticket at all. A soon as someone decides that they don't want to following these rules, and that they are simply above all that nonsense, then it's not hard to see that we are just a stone throw off from sheer anarchy. Once the genie is out of the bottle it's not going to be easy to put it in again.
I can understand why to break the convention would be quite tempting. Someone else has something that you want and feel entitled to - after all you arrived here first. If they are too lazy to get here on time, or want to waste time queuing at the bar then more fool them. They deserve to lose their seat. It's their own fault and they deserve everything they get. Just let them try and move me! Ha! I'll show them. This is my land now and there is nothing they or anyone can do about it.......
.....wait we are still talking about concert seats aren't we?......
So I've digressed. Again. Back to the point.
Yes, it's quite easy to come to the conclusion that we are all heading for disaster. Markets flutter seemingly at the sight of a slightest risk. Financial markets mind you, not the retail kind. Which also flutter but it's usually due to a stiff breeze and not some megalomaniacal leader in a big house. Not only markets but we all seem to be eyeing each other with suspicion and wondering who is going to react first. Technically you can't react first, as the definition of a reaction requires something to happen in order for it to be reacted to. I guess that just goes to show how jittery people are when they are even considering a pre-emptive reaction. Hhhmmm. Anyway, let's just agree that the world appears to be on a knife edge and leave it at that.....
What? Oh, yes the chasm of anarchy. That's where I came in but I appear to gone off the point. Sorry.
Right. The chasm of anarchy. You see last night Auckland was fortunate enough to have the rather splendid PJ Harvey within it's city limits and I, being appreciate of her music, decided to go along and see her an her band perform songs from her latest release. All was going swimmingly; I found the venue, parked the car and bought a pie and a packet of crisps from the canteen - we are quite civilised here in New Zealand when it comes to live entertainment.
Being of an age, I had decided to purchase tickets for the seating area and so I obediently went up the stairs and found my allocated seat. It wasn't difficult and just a case of matching the row letter with the seat number. I am regularly surprise to see how often people find this concept of alpha-numerical system of seat assignments so difficult, be it a concert, cinema or aeroplane. In this case, people seemed to take an age debating whether they had the right row, seat or even if this was the place they were supposed to be at in the first place. I did wonder that very thought when I glanced along my row to see an elderly couple sat starting out at the sea of people. Security is quite tight these days so I assume they were at the correct concert and not wondering why so many people were dressed in leather to see Richard Clayderman.
Anyway, after a few wrong turns and heated debate about the seat assignments, people eventually settled down to watch the concert. Or at least I thought they had. Then it all started to kick off'
"Excuse me, I think you have the wrong seat," a bearded man said to the couple in the row in front of me
"Yes we do but you see someone has sat in our seats so we just sat here," came the response.
"I see, but these are our seats," came the reply, quite inevitably
"Well there are still plenty of others so just pick another," the wrongly-seated couple offered.
The advice was taken and so another couple sat in the incorrectly allocated seats. This wasn't going to end well.
Predictably, another few people arrived to find that their seats had also been commandeered by a displaced customer and they, like those before them, sloped off to find an empty set of seats. The ball was really rolling now, as more and more people were unable to take their seats as displaced people had occupied their spot. Tensions were rising as people feared that there would not be enough room for everybody and voices were starting to be raised and fists clenched. The venues security team were called in to try and placate people and resolve the issue.
"Sir, can you please move to your correct seat," one particularly burly guard suggested
"I'd love to but someone is already sat in it and won't move," came the response, "If you can free our seats we'll happily move but otherwise we're not budging!".
A rather brave response I must say given the size of the guard.
The security guard set off to find the offending person and was never seen again. I must say, for the record, that I was sat in the correct seat and was enjoying the spectacle safe in the knowledge that I had followed the rules and done nothing wrong. Not that would have been any comfort to me if it all went biblical, so to speak. I was sat right in the middle of the action and was in no place to feel smug and safe at the same time.
"Those are our seats, please move."
The bearded man was back and having another go at reclaiming his seats.
"Oh you again. Sod off and find another!"
Yikes, it really was going to get rough in here. And the concert had not even started yet. I started to consider my options. Should I stay put and risk getting caught in the cross-fire, despite knowing that I was in the right? Maybe I should make a hasty retreat and go and stand on the ground floor with the rest of the great unwashed. No damn it! I'd chosen a while ago that I wanted to have a seat and have a seat I would, even if it cost me my front teeth. I would take the moral high ground and stay put. Actually I sunk as low as I could into my seat and hoped the whole thing would just blow over....
...and as the house lights went down and PJ came onto the stage people cut their losses and sat down. Phew! Little did PJ know but she had disarmed the situation and peace had returned to the provinces. Or at least the dress circle for which I was mightily relieved.
But what is it that makes someone decide that they can just sit anywhere, despite clearly having been allocated a particular seat? Is it arrogance, ignorance or a mixture of both? Why do they thing that they have more rights than anyone else. Presumably their seat was not to their liking so they took someone else's? Maybe theirs was a bit cramped and they needed more room? Or perhaps they just wanted to cause trouble?
Without sounding all British, seat allocations are there for a reason. To allocate seats to people who have bought tickets and systematically dole out space. It's a fair and simple system - those who get tickets early can choose where they want to sit, safe in the knowledge that the seat will be there waiting for you. Leave it a bit too late and you get whatever is left, thankful in the knowledge that you were lucky to get a ticket at all. A soon as someone decides that they don't want to following these rules, and that they are simply above all that nonsense, then it's not hard to see that we are just a stone throw off from sheer anarchy. Once the genie is out of the bottle it's not going to be easy to put it in again.
I can understand why to break the convention would be quite tempting. Someone else has something that you want and feel entitled to - after all you arrived here first. If they are too lazy to get here on time, or want to waste time queuing at the bar then more fool them. They deserve to lose their seat. It's their own fault and they deserve everything they get. Just let them try and move me! Ha! I'll show them. This is my land now and there is nothing they or anyone can do about it.......
.....wait we are still talking about concert seats aren't we?......
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