It All Adds Up

One of the (many) things I will miss about New Zealand is its adverts. That may sound like an odd statement but New Zealand’s advertising is in a class of its own. 

Of course there are those ads that believe that shouting at the viewer will somehow make the message hit home, as if the words were physical and can be hammered into your subconscious. You know the type, “BOB’s BEDS ARE THE BEST BEDS IN THE CITY SO COME ON DOWN AND GET A BARGAIN TODAY!” or “WE LOVE CARPETS AT CARPET WORLD. DON’T JUST TAKE OUR WORD FOR IT - COME AND SEE OUR CRAAZZYY PRICES.” or my favourite “WANT THE BEST BULL SEMEN? WELL YOU KNOW WHERE TO COME….” 

Okay so that last one might be a slight exaggeration, but I do remember seeing an add for bull sperm on our first visit to New Zealand - during a prime time rugby match no less - and thinking this was a country that I just had to investigate further.

ANY WAY WITHOUT FURTHER….sorry. Anyway without further ado, here are my favourite adverts from the wonderful but at times strange country. (And I hope these links work for you  otherwise this is going to be a somewhat pointless blog)

Mitre10 Kids

Rather than save the best until last, I’ll dive right in with the best. Why is it the best? Well kids are just funny, this delves into the kiwi psyche regarding DIY and it gently pokes fun at the Aussies. In a little brother / big brother kind of way.

“She’s pretty big job”

“Nah, we’ll knock it off in half a day”

 Watch and enjoy…

Trumpet Togs or Undies

Honestly, this one could be a public information film. I’ve been to loads of beachside towns and have often wondered whether some individuals enjoy walking around half-naked. Yes I know it’s warm but really…… Anyway this advert is a sharp piece of satirical writing and is helping sell ice cream. What could be better?

Waka Kotahi NZTA Road Toll

Not all New Zealand adverts are comical but boy can they be hard hitting. This one, from the national highway agency strikes right in the solar plexus. If this is what it takes to get our horrendous accident statistics to improve then so be it. 

Mr Frosty and the BMX Kid

With the 100% Pure New Nealand, the ad department really knocked it out of the park. And this example is probably the best. Not an advert for an ice cream with sprinkles, but an invitation to come and take a look at this unique part of the world. Aotearoa beckons….eat some ice creams, do some bombs. What’s stoppin’ ya?

Pineapple Lumps

New Zealand isn’t all ice cream and scenery. Nope, not at all. It’s also confectionery and there’s no sweet that screams NEW ZEALAND more than the humble Pineapple Lump. Don’t worry, there’s no fruit in this lolly but there is a squishy pineapple centre covered in chocolate. And like the previous add, they’re 100% Pure New Zealand.

And here’s another one riffing on the fact that they’re a true kiwi icon and gently poking fun at the British the same time. Sweet!

The Hellers Butcher Guy

Meat. New Zealand does great meat. Although this wasn’t the specific advert I was looking for, it does give a flavour of the meat based advertising we get here. The synopsis is, and do try and keep up, Man comes back home, wants to feed his family so naturally only meat will do. In fact, only Hellers brand of packaged meat products will do.  

In this advert the Hellers Butchers Guy has a problem or a snag (which is also slang for sausages) as he needs to feed his family at short notice, so naturally starts raving about Hellers Deli meats. Except I heard Jelly Meats and didn’t like the sound of those so for months was put off the idea of Hellers products. Which is probably a good thing because they are mass produced and there are many better alternatives. On the plus side though, it means we get regular adverts for meat on telly. Sandwiched, as it were, between two other kiwi staples, powerful 4x4s and beer.

Air New Zealand Safety Video

Although not strictly an advert, a honourable mention has to go to the Air New Zealand safety videos. You know, those often dull information videos that play as flights prepare to take off. Well they’re not dull here, and this one is based on Lord of the Rings. Did you know the movies were filmed in New Zealand? No? Well that’s not surprising I guess as we hardly ever mention it…..